Here’s a very popular TED talk, a story that continues to be re-told by all kinds of people – spiritual gurus, coaches, bartenders, artists, blah-ggers. She’s not a wizened wise woman, she’s kinda Top-40, looks like Martha Stewart (but didn’t have to go to prison to have a breakdown or learn humility) but she nails the talk. She speaks to the obsessive perfectionists among and within us, who don’t want to explore any sticky childhood stuff in our pasts before we moved away, broke away, changed our names, to the Successful Self who just want “the tools, the strategies,” the instant cure to take away the pain of failure or feeling lame.
If, after you watch this TED talk from 2010, and you want 20 more minutes of Mrs. Brown two years and 10 million hits later, check it out. She gets deeper into the differences between guilt and shame. You know: “I’m sorry because I made a mistake” vs. “I’m sorry I am a mistake” & If we’re waiting to take a risk until we’re “bulletproof and perfect,” we’ll be waiting for ever.